thanks. really, i appreciate it.
i don't even know what to say about you. you get pissed off because i want to apply to other colleges, just in case. but no, thirty-five dollars is too much to ask for that. and now, you're pissed off and trying to tell me i can't go to murray? because of the cost? oh, please. go fuck yourself. and then the, "well you can go, but you'll have to get a student loan." well damn, ain't that a fucking shame? your only child who gives a damn about the grades she makes and who is trying to be in the top 10% for college doesn't even get to do what she wants in college? and, oh, well it'll be okay if i get that presidential scholarship, you know, the one you've told me i'm not going to get. just like you said i wasn't going to make GSP. oh, wait, look at that - didn't i make GSP? did you miss that? i try. i actually Try and it doesn't fucking matter, because all you're ever going to focus on is what i can't do, instead of what i can. hence the fact that i hardly ever believe i can do ANYTHING! FUCK YOU! oh, and mom, please, please - i love it when you get mad at me because i take my money and buy a shirt because it's cheaper and i don't have enough money to buy a pant suit. oh, how it makes my day. really. please continue, and please continue to push me away by not talking to me when you're angry, and by getting sad when i don't want to do something with you, because you're too goddamn busy whenever i ever ask to do something with you anyway. oh fuck this. fuck the goddamn superbowl. i wish eric was still here. i wish we were still laying on my bed, with him asleep on my shoulder. |
2008-02-03 at 5:45 p.m. |